EXCERPT

EYE OF NEWT
by Denise Dietz

 


Salem Village
10 June, 1692

     Bridget Bishop danced, though dancing was forbidden. In death she cared naught for the laws of the Church, much less for her neighbours’ opinions.
     Several people craned their necks, straining to see if Bridget would turn herself into a black pig. But the witch-woman merely flaunted her macabre dance, her sway aided by a whistling wind.
     During Bridget’s trial, John Gedney had testified that she had no substance. “I endeavored to clap my hands upon her and said, ‘You devil, I will kill you,’ but could feel no substance,” John testified. “Whereupon I struck at her with a stick and broke the stick but felt no substance.”
     Lies, all lies, thought Anne Kittridge. Because Bridget was unquestionably flesh and blood. If she truly lacked substance, would she not have vanished into thin air before they tied the rope around her neck?
     Anne drew her gaze away from Gallows Hill and focused, instead, upon a secluded pasture. Four and a half months with child, she had pleaded a backache, but her ruse proved unsuccessful when the Reverend resolutely insisted that every woman in his congregation attend the hanging. Men burdened with chores had been granted leave, the reason why her beloved John was absent.
     Fence shadows had begun to lengthen across a dun-colored road and the setting sun deepened the adjacent hills to amethyst. Somewhere, a shepherd piped a homing tune to his flock. A dog joined in, its condemnatory bark louder than the piper or the bleating sheep.
In close proximity, Anne heard snatches of conversation. Stemming from three or four different directions, the disjointed sentences converged upon her ears like claps of distant thunder.
     “ Dorcas Good, five years old, has a familiar . . .”
     “ Isaac Cummings’ sick mare was ridden all night by witches . . .”
     “ A small snake that sucks at her forefinger . . .”
     “ Isaac lit the mare’s fart . . .”
     “ Reverend Parris preached on John 6, 70 . . .”
     “ Dorcas Good’s finger has a red spot the bigness of a flea bite . . .”
     “ Reverend Parris had in mind Rebecca Nurse . . .”
     “ Tituba Indian swore the devil bid her serve him . . .”
     “ The child’s mother, Sarah Good, has a cat and a yellow bird and a thing with wings and two legs and a head like a woman . . .”
     “ Is it not difficult to catch a witch? Satan is the Prince of Lies . . .”
     “ Isaac said he’d rather ha’ a dead mare than a burnt barn . . .”
     “ When ye seek a witch, look for evidence of malice . . .”
     Anne wished she could stop up her ears, especially when she spied Sally, her sister’s sluggish maidservant, with two other girls. Their voices rode the wind.
     “ Oi seen a werelion last noight,” Sally said. “Atop the ridge.”
     “ Ye means a werewolf,” said the second girl.
     “ Nay. Oi seen a werelion.”
     “ Mayhap ‘twas a ghost to witch us off the land.”
     “ Forfend ‘twasn’t ould Satan hisself,” said the third girl.
     “ In the ould country,” said the second girl, “oi seen a man what et children. He’d cotch a poor mite, hang ‘im on the wall like a strung-up fowl, an plunge a dagger through ‘is heart. The man done it to please the devil.”
     “ After I seen the werelion, me grannie cotched a toad an put ‘im in a cage an dragged ‘im round the church three toimes an buried ‘im near the graves . . .”
     Sally’s voice trailed off as she drew her companions closer to the gallows.
     Anne grimaced. A werelion? What next? A weresheep? A werespider?
     “ Goody Bishop bewitched her first husband to death.”
     Anne turned toward Yosef Solom, a stout man whose voice would put a loon to shame. “‘Tis nothing more than a rumour,” she said.
     “‘ The devil did come bodily unto her,’” Yosef shrilled, “‘and she was familiar with the devil, and she sat up all night long with the devil.’ So says Bridget Bishop’s third husband, Edward Bishop.”
     A Dutch woman, Ketzia van Rijn, said, “God allemachtig, Bridget oft vears a red stomacher! Does that not prove she’s a vitch?”
     “ Red is not uncommon,” Anne said, “and stomachers can be easily dyed.”
     “ The dyer, Samuel Shattuck, says Bridget brought him sundry pieces of lace, so short he could not judge them fit for use. Everyone knows that a vitch doll is oft clothed in the same materials and colors as clothing vorn by her victims.”
     “ Samuel Shattuck carries a grudge,” Anne said earnestly. “His son was unaccountably ill of fits. A passing stranger proposed the boy was bewitched and offered to take him to Bridget and scratch her face.”
     “ Aye. Drawing blood from a vitch’s face can break a spell.”
     “ Bridget said she was not a witch and chased the stranger off with a spade.”
     “ And ever since, the child hath been followed with grievous fits, his head and eyes drawn aside as if they would ne’er come to rights no more . . .” Yosef paused to sleeve the perspiration from his forehead. “He’ll fall into fire and water, if he be not constantly looked to. Bridget Bishop did not have her face scratched, but she scratched the face of Samuel Shattuck’s son.”
     With an effort, Anne kept her hands by her side, sorely tempted to scratch Yosef’s face. “‘Twas only Samuel’s word that his son was branded.”
     Beneath the three stiff white caps that concealed her hair, Ketzia’s cheeks glistened and her under lip thrust out. “Nay,” she said. “‘Tis the judgment of doctors that the boy doth suffer the evil hand of vitchcraft.”
     Anne heard a disappointed murmur hum through the commons. The mob had honestly believed Bridget Bishop would turn herself into a pig. Or a monkey with cock’s feet and claws. Anne’s eyes, usually serene, burned with unshed tears.
     Looking toward her sisters, she saw that Chastity’s eyes were red-streaked and puffy. Mercy had bitten her bottom lip until she drew blood. Capturing their attention, Anne crossed her second finger over her first finger, held up seven fingers, pressed her thumbs together, and waggled her fingers.
     Mercy and Chastity nodded. Both understood Anne’s silent signal. On the morrow, following cock crow, they would convene alongside the round-tiled roof of the Kittridge dovecote.
     Gazing one last time upon the gallows, Anne felt her own throat constrict. Bridget had been brought to trial on June Second. At her trial, several girls told how Bridget’s specter had tormented them. Several men stated that Bridget’s shape had appeared to them in the night and climbed into bed with them.
     Bridget had entered a plea of innocence but the Reverend said: “I believe she practiseth Witchcraft in the Congregation,” and the court found her guilty.
     Guilty. Sinful. Unholy. Anne felt a chill course through her body. Admired for her medicinal skill, she had accrued no malicious gossip. Neither had her sisters, Mercy Birdwell and Chastity Barker. Wed to proud, prosperous, religious men, they had dodged the accusations leveled against less favored goodwives.
     When household chores were completed, or in Chastity’s situation bypassed, Anne and her sisters met inside a bell-shaped cave.
     There, they practiced witchcraft.

 

Chapter One
Friday morning


     My childhood chum, Tommy Murphy, once said: “Never do anything you wouldn’t be caught dead doing.”
     Friday the Thirteenth was a Murphy’s Law kind of day.
     Invisible to everyone except me, Tommy Murphy is the spittin’ image of Gene Kelly. More often than not, I can feel Tommy’s presence, or at least hear the echo of his tap shoes. I’ve never told anybody about Tommy, not even my great-aunt Lillian. She’d say she could materialize a Gene Kelly look-alike, but she tends to screw up incantations. In fact, I’m not sure she’s successfully cast a spell since 1960-something. So Gene Kelly might very well come out looking like Liberace. Or Kermit the Frog.
     Supposedly, I’m descended from a long line of witches, some good, some bad. To my knowledge, none materialized inside a bubble, none ruled Munchkins, none gave orders to flying monkeys, and none polluted the air with smoke or broom straw. The majority of my ancestors traveled from Europe to Massachusetts via conventional means. In other words, they shipped themselves.
     Seventeenth-century men and women didn’t practice birth control. Therefore, the prolific members of my New World family spawned multiple progeny, the majority of whom were male. Still, the family allegedly birthed at least one witch per generation. I’m the nominee for this generation.
     I own Lilly’s Apothecary, and witchy gossip is good for business. While I don’t believe for one moment that I’m a witch, if people want to pay big bucks for a spell or medicinal herb why argue with them? The IRS allows me to deduct eye of newt, magic potions, and prickly plants steeped in honey, guaranteed to protect against hostility and drive out all diseases. Those are business expenses. I wonder if the IRS would be so compliant if they knew I didn’t believe in magic.
     I’ve got to hand it to my great-aunt Lillian, who tried her best to make me a good little witch. While other kids chanted their ABCs, I memorized incantations. While other little girls groomed Barbie and Ken, I stuck pins into nameless rag dolls. I even toted Aunt Lillian’s black goat, Tituba, to Show and Tell. As I earnestly explained the history of “familiars,” Tituba suffered stage fright, pooped all over the classroom floor, and ate our spelling tests. To this day, I think my teacher’s reaction was unwarranted.
     Shortly thereafter, my family (minus Tituba) moved to Colorado and I learned to keep my mouth shut. Still, rumors surfaced. “Sydney’s ancestors were wiped out, burned at Salem,” the kids whispered loudly.
     First, if my ancestors had been “wiped out” I wouldn’t be here. Second, Salem witches were usually hanged, not burned. Third, it’s common knowledge that no witchcraft was practiced in 1692 Massachusetts, that the behavior of the afflicted, including their convulsive fits, was fraudulent, and that the witch accusers were encouraged by the clergy, who used the fear of witchcraft to bolster their power.
     My father, Nicholas Nickleby St. Charles III, always said that witchcraft did exist and was widely practiced in seventeenth-century New England. However, it worked then, as it works now, through psychogenic rather than occult means, producing hysterical symptoms. The witch accusers, Nicholas said, were not fraudulent. They were pathological.
     I tend to side with my father. Take Elvis. His fanatics reached a state of mass hysteria, despite dire warnings from parents and clergy. Elvis possessed more power than a dozen priests put together, and his pelvis could generate more hysteria than a whole coven of witches.
     Which brings me, in a round-about way, to the murder of Clive Newton.

 

Chapter Two
Friday morning

     Never do anything you wouldn’t be caught dead doing.
     Ignoring Tommy Murphy’s advice, I hurriedly grabbed some rumpled clothes from my hamper, brushed-off my hairbrush, and shunned all makeup.
     My great-aunt Lillian would never step outside the house unless she was coordinated, and I don’t mean to suggest that her pointy hat matched her pointy shoes. Except for Disney films, Casper cartoons, and poorly directed Macbeth productions, witches tend to look like everyone else. Bewitched is a good example of a normal, everyday witch, if you exclude the nose-twitching. Witches don’t nose-twitch.
     I hadn’t even bothered to shave my legs, which poked out from a pair of cutoffs that had once been bell-bottoms. Since I’m not real good with scissors, the faded denim molded my right buttock and kitty-cornered my left buttock. My rubber flip-flops flip-flopped through the aisle of a Colorado Springs Safeway. Rapidly stocking my supermarket cart, I spied Augusta Lowenfeld. She swept by me like the prow on a ship, then did an about-face. In a voice that made the fillings in my teeth ache, she said, “Sydney St. Charles, as I live and breathe! Have you heard the latest news about the murder?”
     Gusta talks in exclamation points and question marks. Fifty-six, she tries to look forty-six. During a power failure she almost succeeds.
     “ What murder?” I said, knowing that Gusta writes a gossip column for the Manitou Falls Monthly and is usually a month behind.
     “ Clive Newton, of course! He’s a local boy!”
     Well . . . not exactly. Before his untimely demise, Clive lived in Colorado Springs, next door to Manitou Springs. Manitou Falls is nestled between Manitou Springs and Green Mountain Falls, so “local” is stretching it.
     I had heard about Clive’s death. Who hadn’t? A young star on the brink of making it Jim-Morrison-big, his body had been found in Black Forest, a residential area that’s zoned for horses. In fact, Clive’s body and head – minus ears, testicles, fingers, and toes – had been discovered one month ago, immediately following the February issue of the Manitou Falls Monthly. So I could be polite and let Gusta ramble on about the murder, or I could be rude and finish my grocery shopping.
     “ I saw the news on TV,” I said, compromising. “All the local channels carried it. Then Denver picked up the story, then CNN, then Dateline and – ”
     “ Does your mother know you go out in public like that?” Gusta examined me, her thickly-penciled eyebrows merging, and I made a silent vow to lose the fifteen (or twenty) pounds I’d vowed to lose last New Year’s Eve. “You’re how old now, Sydney? Forty?”
     “ Thirty-five,” I blurted, stung. Trying to regain my composure, I reminded her that my mother had passed away.
     Her thin-lipped smile of satisfaction vanished as she said, “If you’ve got lemons, make lemonade!”
     “ Excuse me?”
     “ Have you heard about the latest body part?”
     My mind hop-scotched from lemonade to Clive Newton. The killer had been mailing the missing portions of Clive’s body to members of his singing group, The Newts, although no one, including the Colorado Springs Police Department, could fathom why. The last gift, a big toe, had been soaked in formaldehyde.
     Gusta’s scornful glower had pin-pointed my crotch so my first thought was: testicles. Someone Priority-mailed Clive’s testicles.
     My second thought was to wonder if Gusta’s glare had merely encompassed my cutoffs. The shorts were skin-tight and I had shunned panties along with my makeup.
     “ Did they mail Clive’s testicles, Mrs. Lowenfeld?”
     “ Sydney St. Charles! Don’t talk dirty!” She smoothed the black lace at her sagging chin line, then tiddledywinked a piece of lint from her black pedal pushers. “They mailed . . .” She paused for effect. “His ring finger!”
     “ Did it happen to have a ring on it?”
     “ Yes! Rampart High!”
     Ashamed of my sarcasm, I remembered that Clive had graduated from Rampart a mere three years ago. Luckily, Old Ed Vernon turned the corner and propelled his squeaky cart toward us. After lecherously staring at my blouse, missing its top three buttons, he said, “Is it true the killer mailed a finger?”
     Gusta’s face lit up, and I surmised the frozen chicken in her basket would saturate its Styrofoam with bloody rime before she finished her recitation.
     As unobtrusively as possible, I maneuvered my cart around Gusta and Ed, then navigated the rest of the aisle. Parallel to Meat, traveling toward Dairy, I bumped into half a dozen Manitou Falls taxpayers. After appraising my tangled ebony curls, the smudges beneath my blue-black eyes, my uneven cutoffs, and my rubber flip-flops, they all told me about Clive Newton’s ring finger.
     The unspoken question was: Can you devise a spell to catch the killer, Sydney?
     The unspoken answer was: No.
     Soon my cart overflowed with the items I planned to serve at my niece’s birthday party. Plus, “impulse groceries.” Goodies included pretzels and doodles, various chips and dips, eggs for deviling, and Coke/Pepsi. Also, economy-size Ocean Spray juices. Condiments. Detergent. Furniture polish. Bacon. The latest Dean Koontz bestseller (with Kevin Bacon on the cover). Frozen waffles. Bagels and cream cheese. Three tubs of ice cream. A box of cake batter, a can of white frosting, and a jar of green food coloring.
     My niece Xanthia, who will turn thirteen this Sunday, collects frogs. So I thought I’d bake a frog-shaped cake with green frosting and serve it with pistachio ice cream. This morning I had considered hiring a magician, but the supermarket receipt, almost as long as my arm, negated that scheme.
     My Honda’s trunk was filled with cartons of clay storage pots, ordered from a local pottery. Haphazardly stacking my groceries on the back seat and floorboards, I hoped I wasn’t breaking any eggs.
     A couple of women, beautifully dressed and rouged and coifed, click-heeled past me. I had met Pam and Deb at a local romance writers’ session, after accepting an invitation to give a talk on witches. My great-aunt Lillian, who lives with me, said a Merlinesque dissertation (her words, not mine) would be good for business.
     Halting momentarily, the two romance authors surveyed my hairdo, my cosmetic-free face, and my tacky outfit, all the way down to my flip-flops. Then they nodded hello and continued clicking. I smelled Deb’s potent perfume, heard the words “a shame,” and wished I had taken the time to safety-pin my gaping bodice. Or at least spray myself with cologne.
     Never wreck your car unless you’re wearing clean underpants. Translation: Never do anything you wouldn’t be caught dead doing. So far, I had encountered the town gossip, the town lecher, a slew of chatty acquaintances, and two high-heeled advertisements for a torrid romance novel. Thank God my Murphy’s Law day was almost over.
     My stressed-out shoulders sought my car’s fake-fur seat cover as I buckled my seat belt, turned on the radio, started up the engine, cruised through the parking lot, and just missed the light at the Safeway exit. A watched pot never boils and a watched red light never changes, so my gaze strayed, catching the avid gaze of the homeless man who stood near my car. I wanted to look away but was mesmerized by a pair of intense indigo eyes.
     Did Deb’s “a shame” refer to the homeless man?
     He looked part Irish, part American Indian; Daniel Day Lewis and Tonto. The strap of a shabby guitar case was slung across one shoulder. Clothed in too-short, oversized jeans, held up by a pair of red suspenders, his long russet hair was neatly trapped by a beaded headband and three buttons on his once-white shirt were missing. Although he possessed a furry chest, rather than bra and breasts, his shirt-gaffe duplicated mine, and I experienced a moment of genuine empathy.
     Before I could look away, he glimpsed the expression on my face. Thrusting forth his WILL WORK FOR FOOD sign, he smiled.
     I had never seen a vagrant with such perfect incisors, not to mention canines and bicuspids. He could star in a toothpaste commercial. Or the late-night infomercial that promises bleached teeth.
     Damn. Here I sat, grocery sacks threatening to burst my car at the seams. The Miracles crooned “Get A Job” from my car radio, and I knew my expression had changed from empathy to guilt.
     Reluctantly, I beckoned him closer and fumbled for my purse.
     “ No, ma’am,” he said. “I don’t take charity.”
     “ Then you meant what you said?”
     “ Ma’am?”
     “ Your sign?”
     “ Yes, ma’am, I’ll work for food.” He smiled again. “Or, even better, a bath and some fresh clothes.”
     He didn’t sound like a bum. A panhandler, or tramp, or whatever the heck they’re called nowadays, wouldn’t be concerned with a bath and fresh clothes, at least not as an alternative to cold hard cash. Had he seen the disdainful glares of the romance writers? If true, we definitely had something in common.
     Maybe he was incognito, planning to write a tell-all article. In my mind’s eye, I could see the first lines of the last paragraph: Sydney St. Charles, a good Samaritan, kept me from starving to death. Ms. St. Charles, a local witch who owns an herbal apothecary at 36410 Reverend Hale Avenue, also cast a charming charm . . .
     Aunt Lillian would say it was “good for business.”
     What charming charm could I cast? The one that helps a person gain favor in the eyes of others? An easy spell, all it requires is sand and a magnet. Plus, an incantation that includes the words: “Metal of strength. Blood of earth. Out of death. I draw thee forth.”
     It had been a mild winter, an early spring. My grass had begun to grow, along with a few weeds, and my white picket fence needed a new coat of paint. There were heavy boxes in the trunk of my car, not to mention my multiple grocery sacks. Toting them up the steps of my house would justify herbal shampoo and soap.
     I even had some Jim clothes and sneakers, stored inside a guest room closet. My stormy three-year relationship with Jim had ended nine months ago, but I’d kept some of his clothes, tempted to chant a nasty incantation over them. If I were a real witch, I’d have put a curse on Jim without a moment’s hesitation.
     Suddenly, I heard Tommy Murphy’s precautionary tap-tap-tap and remembered Clive Newton’s big toe and ring finger.
     Yeah, sure, but would a vicious killer plead for clean clothes? No. He’d rob a Laundromat.
     “ Your eyes don’t look like a murderer’s eyes,” I mumbled, unaware that I’d spoken out loud.
     Until the man said, “No, ma’am, I’m not a murderer, and you’ve got very pretty eyes.”
     He gave me that killer smile again. I’d have to make a decision soon. The light had turned green and several pickup trucks were honking like a flock of angry geese. The truck directly behind me sported a National Rifle Association bumper sticker.
     “ Get in the car,” I said. “Hurry.”

 


©2004 by Denise Dietz
Excerpt from
Eye of Newt
Five Star Publishing
Trade Paperback ISBN: 1-4104-0241-X
Hardcover ISBN: 1-59414-096-0 -9

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